Obsession

I’ve been listening to Nina’s Live album for these past few days. I don’t know why but there is one song that I keep playing over and over and over again—“I love you Goodbye” This is a post-break-up song, which doesn’t really reveal the current state of my heart right now. Haha!

Somehow the songs that you’re listening to reflect what you are currently feeling or the mood you are in. Does my newfound penchant for this song mean that I’m contemplating on a change of heart? (Ponders on it for a split second and dismisses the thought… hehe!)

I’m not heartbroken or anything but the lyrics of the song “I love you Goodbye” really hit a soft spot inside me. It’s as if it’s saying exactly what’s on my mind right now :

” I wish someday you can, find some way to understand, I’m only doing this for you…I don’t really want to go but deep in my heart I know this is the kindest thing to do..”

"Oh i don't wan t to leave you , baby it tears me up inside, but i'll never be the one you're needing, i lov you goodbye...."

It is because I am leaving for home in a few days and I will be leaving the life that I have grown to love. I will be leaving this place where I found love so true and so sincere. I don’t really want to leave, but circumstances lead me to choose between staying and leaving. And this, I hope he’ll understand.

But there's one thing i'm sure of, i shall return...and when i do, i'm going to make things work out the way it should.

****

Charmed

Over bottles of C2 and a bag of chips, I spent a 2-day DVD-thon watching 4 seasons of The Charmed Ones series. I realized how much I missed watching this series. I miss Prue so much. She’s my favourite of the trio coz she’s got guts and beauty… but I also noticed that she’s the only one in the group who seems to be prone to attacks from the strange kind. I was kinda disappointed when she “died” at the end of the 3^rd (or 4^th? I’m not sure) season. Oh bummer, it really took me so long to get used to having Paige around. Something’s just off about Paige you know, she’s too damn white (almost Michael Jackson-esque kind of white). Ok, maybe I was just sore because Prue got killed off. Bummer!

***

Guys! Please pray for my safe journey! I love you all....

Updates…

Well, it’s been a long week and the much-coveted sem-break turned out to be such a bitch! Well, to start off, my computer bogged down after a month of using the crystalxp bricopack
software. I can’t even recover my files, pictures and videos. I had to reformat my pc and here I am, stuck in a cheap internet café. Oh well, this is life. It’s just a shame all my pics (and “our” pics) were lost. You guys cannot imagine the hell I’ve been thru! I thought my computer was even plagued with a virus!

Lesson learned? :

Never download free unlicensed software from the net! I don't know if anyone else experienced the same thing i've been thru. But the guy repairing my pc said it was a spyware whice corrupted the operating system of my PC. When it came down to recovery of files....zilch! nada! nada! I felt like crying so hard after that. All my important files gone down the drain. Even my french lessons were gone! oh well, that's life.

moving on...

Hollywood is so fickle

On monday, it was reported that Reese Witherspoon and her husband Ryan Phillippe have separated. Hmmm...so another one bites the dust. So many celebrity couples have split since last year. It has now made me conclude that it is indeed fickle in Hollywood. Nothin lasts in tinseltown. I wonder why is that? I'd not worry about relationships like boyfriend-girlfriend going down the drains. But once you talk about marriage, I guess all the odds are against you. You have to fight to save the marriage no matter how much trouble you and your partner are going through. I mean didn't you promise to love each other for better and for worse? So, how come once the problems come pouring in, the divorce paper becomes the sole option? It just pains me to see couples fall out of love. Maybe because it is the realization that nothing lasts forever in this world--even love.

Because I’m a Girl

I cried buckets and buckets of tears last night because of this Korean music video by the all-girl band KISS. Well, I didn’t understand a thing about their song (although I searched for its English translation out of sheer curiosity) but the video was really heart-wrenching. I couldn’t help but cry my heart out especially the last part. I think i'm obsessed.

I wish the guy didn't leave the girl after giving his eyes...If this happened to me, i would really go out of my way to look for him again. I mean does the guy think that the girl will love him less because he's blind? I mean if it is true love, physical blindness doesn't matter...it's the heart that really sees right? Haaaaiii...i'm just really affected by this. But i gotta give it to them these Koreans, they really know how to break my heart! huhuhuhu! i'm sorry, I'm just a self-confessed helpless romantic. And i always want happy endings...guess that's just too surreal huh?